PixVox » Advertising http://www.markportrait.com a view from the upper left corner Mon, 12 Jul 2010 18:19:01 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 en hourly 1 Giving up on LIFE http://www.markportrait.com/2008/08/18/giving-up-on-life/ http://www.markportrait.com/2008/08/18/giving-up-on-life/#comments Mon, 18 Aug 2008 15:38:41 +0000 mark http://www.markportrait.com/?p=42 This is my official 911 call to all advertising copywriters. If you’ve ever used the word “LIFE” in any headline, body or web copy, it’s time to turn in your union card and head for Arby’s. They’re in desperate need of cheese slicers.  The ad landscape is awash in LIFEstyle messages. Enough! You’re sucking the LIFE out of life.

Before we tackle some of the most blatant violators, let’s be fair and extend a golf clap to these fine products and pubs that get a pass.

  • Lifesavers
  • Life Magazine
  • Life Cereal
  • Life the board game
  • Life Insurance (just kidding)
  • Life (I only have one to give to my country)

And now, here are just a handful of Hall of Fame LIFEsuckers.

  • LIFE Comes At You Fast – Nationwide Insurance (step aside or we’re mailing a check to your family)
  • Life Beckons. Choose wisely Amstel (pick the wrong beer and die)
  • Life is ticking Timex. (tell me about it)
  • Leading Light for Life. Pfizer (absolutely no clue. Better copy writing through pharmaceuticals?)
  • My life. My card. American Express (my draining cash flow)
  • Shoes for life. Clarks Shoes (wow, one pair that expands and then gets super comfy 75 years later)
  • Healthy, Beautiful Smiles for Life. Fixodent (except when they’re in a glass of water)
  • Where there’s life, there’s Bud. Anheuser Busch (where there’s vomit there’s lost car keys)
  • Take it for Life. Midol (I swear, 33 years of marriage and not an unpleasant moment)
  • Life is a journey, travel it well. United Air Lines (please return your life to its full upright position)
  • Life’s a sport. Drink it up Gatorade (bad news…you’re sweating purple)
  • Soak up life Viva Paper Towels (now that’s what I call absorbent)
  • Grab Life by the Horns. Dodge (grab your wallet. You own a Dodge)
  • Life uninterrupted. Luvs (finally a diaper that never needs changing)
  • Eat Life Up. Wish-Bone Salad Dressing (life over 50 = lettuce)
  • It’s not a hotel, it’s a way of life. Holiday Inn (no it’s a motel)
  • The Way Life Should Be. Sicily (an offer you can’t refuse)
  • Live Life. Stay Free. Poise pads and pantiliners (Pretty sure this isn’t a guy thing)
  • Life is harsh. Your tequila shouldn’t be. Jose Cuervo (harsh is a Curevo hangover)
  • Your Best LIFE Now by Joel Osteen (just cause this guy makes my molars ache)

Last and certainly least…

  • Discover a Healthier Slice of Life! Kingsmill Bread (You’re killing me!)
]]> http://www.markportrait.com/2008/08/18/giving-up-on-life/feed/ 2 Death of the BS Artists http://www.markportrait.com/2008/08/13/death-of-the-bs-artists/ http://www.markportrait.com/2008/08/13/death-of-the-bs-artists/#comments Thu, 14 Aug 2008 05:36:40 +0000 mark http://www.markportrait.com/?p=3 Caustic relationships between Advertising and PR folk date back to the earliest days of modern truth stretching. So, all cards up. I’m an Ad Guy. And I admit, I’ve met some fairly interesting PR wonks over the years. None that I’d take home to meet the family, but good sorts. They snort in our direction about lack of discipline. We return the favor with jabs about tassels and wingtips. The truth of who squeezes truth most effectively may reside somewhere firmly in between the two. But neither is without its baggage. The ad industry is bloated and self-indulgent. The PR world is just a drag. But there may be one thing both groups agree on. Social networking and the rapid growth of the web is a real threat to our livelihood. The gig is almost up boys and girls. Speak with any group of twenty somethings and you’ll find a level of cynicism unmatched in modern times. As they Twitter, Digg, Poke and Tap their way to a new kind of community, there is a deep disrespect and almost fervent disdain for practitioners of the subtle art of truth twist. To this generation, an insincere offer, unsubstantiated claim or bloated statistic smells like week old Thai in the glove box. They’ve heard it all and call bullshit at lightning speed.

At the recent Start Conference in San Francisco, I saw the future of truth mining in action. It was the best social experiment I’ve witnessed in years. As Dot Com wizard after VC genius graced the stage, I stayed glued to Twitter on my iPhone. Words of advice rolled forth from the stage. And instantly, responses were published to the web. The pace at which shots were called was blistering. Some were on the mark. Others were over the top. A few were not kind. But all were there for instant review.

Some of this is not new. The blogosphere has been a petrie dish of opinion for years. But the speed that social networking is growing is matched only by the pace that it moves opinions and analysis. Not today, or tomorrow, but soon the gig may be up. The ability of the current crop of truth squeezers to stay ahead of the tappers may end. Some new, more sophisticated, group of twisters will emerge. PR folk will return to dreams of being novelists and Ad Guys will return to just dreaming.

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